NYPD BOOOOO
Oh man. I didn’t want to write another rant, but oh man. I have to.
Why do the douchiest people in the world become cops?
Why?
Why is it that someone who quibbled with authority as a kid, or someone who’s maturity peaked at 12 years old, or someone who gets off on tasing someone in the balls wants to be a cop?
I just spoke with my old high school friend for a good while not too long ago. We wanted to catch up, so asked him what he’s been up to. You know, friend stuff! Yay! He told me he became a deputy sheriff.
Now I like the guy. Good fella. Loyal. Trustworthy. But the wrong guy to be in a place of authority.
This is the guy who’d think it would be funny to call all Arabs, Terrorist. This is the same guy who’s best come back was honestly “I’m gunna make more money than you!” This is the guy who owned a money clip in the shape of his initials, “SAV.” Oh it has more than one meaning.
Now a money clip is pretty douchey for a high schooler. The only people I knew who had money clips were my dad’s business partners. And they were 48 and had at least 2 mistresses they’d go and visit on the weekends. But for him to have a “SAV” one. Oh dear. That’s not “sav” bro.
Now I don’t want to completely vilify my friend. He’s a very sweet guy. A big Giant’s fan. He backed me up in a fight once (that’s important in a man/boy’s life).
But when he told me he wanted to apply to evict people from their homes as a main deputy duty, because he thought it would be fun, was a bit too far. He also believed that having been trained by Marines help mature him. He also really tasered a guy in the balls (which is pretty funny, but still it’s weird).
He does work in Concord, which can be very dangerous actually. But he’s usually hiding behind stop signs and pulling you over because he felt like it. Yeah he’s that guy.
All in all, there’s at least one more douchey cop roaming some suburb somewhere and I’m proud to say he’s my friend. Free cop car rides!
